Being born in Bihar
wasn’t a choice it was merely a coincidence. But being a bihari is a decision I
have taken consciously ( and Tiloo like a good brother simply follows what I
say) . For my mother it has always been about shunning “Bihari” practices and
appearing a Mumbaiya cat. As for Frankoo, he is a gangster. I need not specify
anything. He is a Bihari by deed. If I were a patel maybe I could have migrated
to the United States of America. A dream my mother has always seen. She wants
bigger things in life. She feels that rats in Amrica must be fatter than the
ones here. After all Social Service lean rats ko parents se remove kar dega na?
She is too ambitious trust me!
Hmm… try googling Bihar. Its like a million
pages of what you would not want your kid to become. Its like a million pages
dedicated to the bad things in life. Numerous appeals for hanging a Bihari, for
castrating them and to remove their abominable gene pool (but I am still
searching for a plea to kill Frankoo, why the bastard is not convicted, heaven
only knows). So why do I have to acknowledge that I am a bihari? Well, when I meow
I meow with a drawl, I burp, I fart and I have problems with genders. For example:
“neend” (read sleep) aati hai not aata hai , taarein (read stars) aate hai and
not aata hai and most importantly I say “kaahe?”, for all of you who do not
know (or fellow biharis who “act like they don’t know) kaahe is the Bihari
counterpart of “why”. So yes, I am a bihari in flesh and soul. Like they say you
can take a bihari out of bihar but you cannot take bihar out of a bihari.
Even if I were Biloo
gates or Biloo Mittal, show me 10 rs. And
I would still think about picking it up. Duh, that is not Bihari just plain bad
conscience. See, that is the prejudice I face in being a Bihari. Why think
first? Give the bloody bihari a chance…..And also I have the
strange fixation for “the bhoujis” aka the sister-in-laws, I guess that becomes enough proof for my mighty alliance with the State of Bihar........
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